A Near Miss

by Dana and her mother

Some of the visitors to this website are under 18, so I advise them to speak to their parents about the fact that they are e-mailing me. In this case, a mother was approached by her 17 year old daughter and made direct contact with me. This gave me the chance to enquire about a parent's view of the life of one young womb twin survivor. Anxious to do what she could to help her daughter, who was suffering from depression, she told me the story of how her daughter's twin was lost in a miscarriage.

The mother's story

I went to the Doctor and was advised that I was pregnant. A few weeks later I started to have some bleeding so the Doctor came and advised bed rest. When the bleeding stopped the Doctor sent me for an ultrasound to make sure everything was OK. I was around about 6 or 8 weeks at this stage.

They showed me the screen and there was something in my tube, but there was also something still in the uterus. They told me I had had a partial miscarriage and therefore would have to have a curettage to clean out the remainder in my uterus. They booked me into hospital to have the procedure.

I went home and motherly instinct and gut feeling kicked in. I went to bed and arose early next morning. With my overnight bag I set off for the hospital, but on the way there I detoured to my Doctor and told her I still felt pregnant and was not comfortable about having the curettage.

I had taken a urine sample that morning so the Doctor re-tested and sure enough she said, "Go home, you are pregnant."

I had been on the pill when I fell pregnant and continued to take it for another month unawares, so whether that contributed or whether it was just the stress of my troubled relationship I don't know, but my daughter hung in there, thank goodness.

The daughter's story

Mum said I had a twin and something happened and Mum went to the doctors and he said she had lost both the babies. Then Mum felt weird and she went to the doctors a bit after that and he had a look and told her that she still had one and that was me. I am suffering severe depression and I got the sudden urge to look up about my twin.

The questions actually fill a lot of holes that I have been thinking about and common symptoms are not being able to sleep alone, lack of self confidence, always feeling there is something missing and feeling like there is just someone else there not just me, it's hard to explain. It was good to hear my story.

I guess it is encouraging to know that someone wanted me to be on this earth and that that sort of a miracle can happen. I still have a lot of those feelings you describe...which seem to be getting worse, but slowly I am identifying where their roots are.