Stories

Surviving the death of my womb twins


by Claudia


This is a report of my own experience of having survived the death of my womb twins. I became aware of the prenatal sensations and perception that I describe here during a body-psychotherapy I did as a part of my new professional training. Although I had no real evidence that we were multiples, this knowledge from my prenatal time has brought me closer to myself, and has added a truly essential positive change in my self knowledge.


I have now a blog [gemeo-sobrevivente.blogspot.com] where I post in Portuguese all kinds of interesting information related to womb twin survivors.


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This is a poem written when I was 18 years old:

Sinto que me elevo lentamente


Onde estou não estou também


Estou sempre uns metros mais a cima


Enquanto eu, vazia de alguém


Fico cá em baixo e desespero


Fogem-me as rédeas de quem sou


A de cima voa, observa


Como uma estranha vinda do nada.


A de baixo procura nua e só


Como as ruínas de uma casa abandonada


E eu vou caindo muito fundo


Num vazio escorregadio e irreal


Mas que acaba lá muito longe


É esse Fim a origem desse mal?


I feel as if I'm slowly rising up.


Where I am, I am not as well


I'm always a few meters further up


While, empty of anyone,


I stay here below, in pure despair.


From me escape the reins of who I am;


The one that's above flies, observes,


Like a stranger from nowhere.


The one from below searches naked and alone


Like the walls of an abandoned house in ruins.


And I keep on falling very deeply,


In a slippery and unreal emptiness,


That finishes far, far away


Is that End the origin of this ailment?